Saturday, May 16, 2009

California Dreaming

The geekyfamily had been contemplating leaving the golden state. A potential career opportunity for me had us considering upping sticks and moving east. Ultimately the job fell through, and the move is not going to happen, but in considering it, we meandered conversationally through many different future scenarios for our lives. Who's career ascent will we follow? What kind of a community do we want to raise our family in? How far away from our extended family can we be?

For now we're going to carry on being a San Francisco family. Last year, after years of yearning after the pictures in "better homes and gardens" we finally bit the bullet and had our little backyard landscaped into a city oasis, and it would have been a shame to leave before we got a chance to enjoy it. While considering this other job, I was offered a great new position at my existing company, so the sting of this other position closing up is not so bitter.

I think we could have done it and been happy, left San Francisco behind as a chapter in our lives. I expect one day we will.

One day back in February when I first became aware of the job I considered, I took a day off with the kids and took them to the exploratorium. I drove back, climbing high through Pacific Heights with the sky azure and the bay glittering behind me. A ridiculous picture postcard day, made more ridiculous by the fact that we just have so many impossibly beautiful days here.

I moved here in 1996. My hair was long with a thick platinum streak. I dressed from thrift stores and had my belly button pierced. That afternoon I felt the twenty five year old I used to be looking at this woman in her Toyota Prius, wearing a worn overwashed Banana Rebublic T shirt and jeans, peering in the rearview mirror at her happy sleepy kids. I felt the intervening years between her and me fly past as the car efficiently powered up and coasted down the hills that I had staggered over between bars and clubs in unsuitable heels, then jogged up and down the next day in an attempt to shake the hangover. I felt so fortunate for the life that has happened to me here, and I'm glad that we will be staying a bit longer.


followthatdog said...

so well written. I know that feeling well. And I miss San Francisco so sincerely it aches.

chihuahua5 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
chihuahua5 said...

ah my little 'stripe', i too remember when you first arrived in SF and into our lives on walter street. glad you'll be enjoying SF a bit longer too :)

Manic Mama said...

Thanks for coming by and posting today! I love that you did, a San Francisco blogger to read- yay! I miss it there every day. Great post!

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