Two worlds combined

The weekend was a great success. Most importantly the birthday boy had a wonderful time surrounded by his friends. The children had a good time too, and didn't break anything or hurt themselves. The weather was good, the house was perfect, the food excellent, the cocktails and wine plentiful and the poolside banter was wry and stimulating.

Yet I came home exhausted. Keeping track of the needs of two small kids in a strange house was wearing. What with snacks, naps, diapers, incessant demands for help with puzzles or playdough, sunscreen or armbands I felt that barely managed a sip of cocktail, a page of my book, a scrap of conversation without interruption.  I felt a gulf between the life of a parent and that of the child free. Most of the guests were childless, either by choice or because they just haven't found the right time for a family yet. All of them were quite lovely with the kids, and did play with them and entertain them extensively, but still, it is mummy they come to when they need something and need it RIGHT NOW. Its only the parents who have to curtail the evening high jinks knowing that morning will come around way too early and way too loudly.

Geekydaddy feels this difference in lifestyle acutely, and though we didn't speak of it directly, I tacitly gave him the weekend "off" kid duty by agreeing to him playing bartender. Once he knew that the house had a poolside bar he procured his mixology supplies and spent a good part of each day muddling up delicious beverages. To his credit he did spend the rest of the time playing with the kids in the pool. I knew this division of labor would leave me as the one to make sure the children were not dehydrated, hungry, overtired, over-televisioned or burning in the sun.

As I drifted in and out of conversations wondering where I had put my drink down, I envied, just a little, my friends who are only answerable to their own needs. We are all about the same age, but having kids forces you to grow up in a different way.  I found myself longing, selfishly, for a few days away just with Geekydaddy, lounging by a pool sipping cocktails. But then I kicked myself and realized how lucky I am to have such great and dear friends, friends with fabulous children of their own, friends who ensure that my kids are welcomed and catered for on their own special occasions and who tell me how wonderful they are at every opportunity. And of course, a husband who can mix a mean mojito.

halloween twins

The Halloween season has begun in earnest. Our costumes got their first outing at a party hosted by my friends K. and J. prior to the neighbourhood 'pumpkin walk'. Carved pumpkins are placed in the community garden, and kids and adults get to enjoy a bit of spooky fun.

K. and I met when we were heavily pregnant in a baby care class at the hospital where we delivered. In retrospect it was quite funny, a class full of professionals in their late 30's being taught by a sweet Berkeley mom subtly emphasising her co sleeping/babywearing/cloth diapering philosophy, to diaper plastic dolls and put them in slings. The class must have been effective, since our girls survived and thrived on our mothering (despite being diapered in disposables and sleeping in cribs. We did at least carry them in slings.) Two and half years later we and our little girls are fast friends.

And we did not plan our costumes together, honestly!

garden party

One of the reasons we have parties is to force us to tidy up. Saturday was spent in a whirlwind of organizing. Geekdaddy was in charge of shopping for last minute necessities (who knew that Whole Foods refuse to sell maraschino cherries because they consider them unwholesome?. Party poopers!), making the marinades and setting up the bar. I tidied and cleaned, using the opportunity to get all the toys into their respective organizer bins (dolly's clothes, baby dollies, toy pots and pans, vehicles, legos, baby rattles, soft toys, puzzles). While geekybaby took his morning nap, and Geekgirl was ensconsed with her Charlie and Lola DVD I got the whole place ship shape, with enough of the aesthetically attractive yet inviting toys displayed to entice the small guests, but not so much hideous noisy plastic tat on display that we would horrify the childless guests.

Then I heard a gasp of horror from Geekydaddy, returned from his garnish gathering. Geekydog, who up until now had been treating the new yard with respect, had attacked and uprooted one of the newly planted euphorbias! Dirt and roots covered the previously perfect patio. And to add insult to injury, we found that orange geek the cat had peed on the kitchen counter. We think the nasty beast was expressing his anger that he was unable to get to the salmon skin in the counter top composting bin.

We cleaned up after our errant animals in time for the first guests to arrive. My mood was much improved by Geekydaddy's most excellent pina coladas, The barbequed chicken and shrimp were just perfect, and a great time was had by guests both large and small.

Though we are realizing that the decorative pebbles our garden designer used between the patio slabs, though they do look very stylish, are not the best choice for a garden frequented by toddlers, especially toddlers whose parents are drinking pina coladas. Inspection of the lawn the next day revealed that the pebbly contents of the patio had been collected and rolled down the slide into a big heap in the grass!