Tuesday, November 11, 2008

stay at home mum day

Geekybaby is not well. He was feverish on Sunday, and still feverish Monday morning. The doctor thinks its probably just a virus, so nothing to worry about. But this is the first time he has been sick, so of course I am a little concerned. Geekybaby is such a cheerful little soul most of the time that it seems even more sad to see him sick. As the second child, he has never gotten as much attention as his older sister did at his age. He seems to have decided that the way to our hearts is through his considerable charms, since rather than being a loud and demanding baby he is a smiler and giggler, a little ray of sunshine. But today he is having trouble letting his sunny side shine (though he is trying, bless him). But I am enjoying being able to cuddle him all day!

Having a sick baby day like this gives me a taste of a different kind of life. Just for today I'm a stay at home mum of one, instead of a working mother of two. We've built some towers of blocks, and played the xylophone, and while he napped I've sorted a pile of laundry that has been needing attention for days, swept a shi tzu sized ball of dog hair out from under the bed, and cleared my cluttered dresser of old costume jewellery that has not been worn in years. I've saved few of the safer pieces for geekygirl's dress up drawer. We walked the dog, geekybaby snug in his ergo carrier, and Geekydog and I enjoying the crisp wintery air (well wintery for San Francisco, we needed our thick sweaters on). It has been a really nice day! Though of course being a stay at home mum of one baby is a breeze compared to having both kids!

Much nonsense is talked about 'the mommy wars', stay at home vs working. The family friendly options that many of my European friends enjoy are difficult to come by here so the choice is starker, and the divide deeper. (For example many of my friends in the UK have a situations where one or both partners, professionals with well paid jobs, work part time, and this is not considered career death).

I'm glad that our situation has worked out so that Geekydaddy and I can continue our careers, and be parents too. Its busy, its expensive, there is never enough time and there is always laundry spilling out of the closet, but it is right for our family. I used to be one of those women who would say 'I could never stay at home with the kids, I'd go insane'. But now that I have the kids I realize that if circumstances demanded it, if a child became ill or had special needs, I would, and I would enjoy it and do it well. You never know what the future holds. Of course maybe this is because I am already insane.